The thing I dislike the most about my new job is the lack of a good post office nearby. It sounds like a stupid thing to say, but I like having a post office I can rely on. Near my old job there was a really big, efficient one where everything ran smoothly and nothing ever went astray.

The post office nearest my new office has been closed down, for reasons unknown. This being the sort of area which is populated by lots of yummy mummies with time on their hands, there is all sorts of protesting of the ’save our post office’ variety going on. Mostly this takes the form of politely-worded posters in shop windows. Yummy mummies aren’t the type to protest loudly or messily, or in any way that might interfere with their morning coffee routines.

So, no nearby post office. Which is a big pain, because I send a lot of stuff abroad. I have junk food exchanges going on with various Americans (how else can I keep myself well-stocked with Goldfish Crackers?) and I need somewhere to dispatch my reciprocal boxes of Dairy Milk and HobNobs.

Also, on Monday, I had wedding invitations to send to parts foreign. So I headed off on my lunch break to walk to the much-further-away post office that hadn’t closed down. When I arrived, the man behind the counter resolutely ignored me for a good five minutes. I was the only customer, and I stood there gawping at him through the glass as he shuffled around putting packages into mail sacks, and then taking them out again at random, stamping bits of paper, putting things into drawers, and generally doing whatever he could to avoid making eye contact with me.

Eventually, I overcame my inner restrained-Brit, and said ‘Excuse me, can you serve me please?’
The man squinted at me, and muttered ‘I am performing a duty.’
And, when he spoke, I was suddenly overwhelmed with waves, waves, of whiskey fumes from his breath. He was completely pissed! At lunchtime on a Monday while in sole charge of a post office!

Disgusted, I marched out of there clutching my un-mailed wedding invitations. I am so upset! All I want is a nice reliable soberly-staffed post office! Why is that too much to ask?